The Knit’n’Commute blankie production line has been going well but I’ve had my first nutter objecting to “train knitting” this week!
I get on the mainline train and get my knitting out. Within three stitches the woman next to me pulls herself up to her sour, scrub faced, puffed up height of self importance and inquires,
“Have you ever considered that it might be dangerous to use such pointed implements? What if there was an accident?”
(I’m currently knitting with 3.75mm knitpicks circular needles)
After catching my breath, I calmly but firmly answered,
” Yes I have, these are less sharp than your average propelling pencil or biro. In the event of an accident or train crash anyone doing a crossword would be just as dangerous.”
” Yes, but I wouldn’t want one of those poked in my eye either!” (Why does every nutter think knitting needles are instantly going to have their eye out?)
” But you wouldn’t consider saying anything to someone sitting here doing the crossword would you?”
She huffed and angrily turned the page of ther crappy free newspaper in an exaggerated way that made me want to giggle.
The chap opposite me who really just wanted a quite trip to work giggled as well.
She fumed the entire 25min trip and over acted the Mrs Angry page turning routine….and I purposefully knitted the entire way.
She nearly exploded when I stood up (still knitting) and disembarked, leaving her apoplectic watching me. ..I enjoyed that.
Like anyone who has had a minor confrontation, I thought of all the things I should have said later…
“Has it occurred to you that if we had an accident or train crash all those people standing up will crash into you?”
“What about all those heavy laptop bags in the overhead parcel shelves?”
” We’re not wearing seat belts you know? That man opposite will probably crush your skull if we hit anything?”
” Everyone on the train has fingers – they could take your take your eye out…maybe all train passengers should wear mittens?”
” Oh Hell. Why don’t you just wrap yourself in cotton wool , goggles, mittens and a crash helmet and let the grown-ups take care of the nasty pointy world??!!”